what is IT? what is this edible thing we have here?

I've written about the Mae Wah store before. It's a vegan wonderland of mysterious processed foods that I only kind of understand. If I thought I would like eating it, maybe I'd try the vegan lobster, mutton or sunny side up eggs?! What is it?
But these things I like a lot and they print right on the bag what they are made of and that we are to rehydrate in hot water (like an instant soup) for 15 minutes to bring them to life. Then you marinate it, and that's really important. You need to marinate it for a long time- 30 minutes at least. Otherwise it literally tastes like nothing. Chewy non-existence.

As I write this, I am thinking about non-asian flavor-inspired ways of utitlizing these stylish things. Stumped. I made a marinade of peanut butter, soy sauce, sesame oil, a little mustard, a little water, sriracha... basically a thinned paste to coat the little guys. This is just a stir fry of vegetables: onions, garlic, scallions, carrots, celery, mushrooms, bok choy.

It seemed like a bad idea to venture further. FYI "Qiáo" is chinese for voila!

Suggested cooking jam: Faith No More, Epic